Reply to Caring for a declining parent

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Caring for a declining parent"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]My 77 yo dad, in a different state, has a set of complex chronic health conditions including: congestive heart failure, chronic liver and kidney disease, severe peripheral arterial disease, mild cognitive impairment and complete neuropathy in both feet. His mobility is severely limited though he can walk around the house (to and from the bathroom for instance), to the car (driven by my stepmom) and from the car to a table at a restaurant or to his theater seats.

He is always in pain, depressed and sick of pills, procedures and doctor's appointments. And according to my stepmom has become quite nasty to her. She's exhausted, sad and angry.

Their absolute priority is to keep him out of a facility (for better or worse - they won't budge on this issue).

They lean on me a lot to help interpret their medical info and both vent to me often about their situation. I've suggested anti-depressants for him (she already takes them) and therapy for one or both them (they are resistant). I've suggested multiple ways they could outsource stuff to make their lives easier (they are resistant).

I know there isn't much I can do - they are who they are but it's hard and sad to see them struggle and suffer.

All of that being said I'm wondering if:

1) Whether seeing a geriatrician as his PCP could help him prioritize so he could maybe only take the pills that help him feel better and prioritize the specialist appointments. And also maybe suggest some things to focus on if the stated goal is to remain in the house. Atul Gawande in Being Mortal talks a lot about how great geriatricians are.

2) He is currently full code - wants full resuscitation efforts. I fear he will be so so infirm if he survives a heart attack that his quality of life will be even worse. I'd like to suggest they reconsider this but I'm having trouble imagining an appropriate way to bring this up.

Anyone else BTDT and have advice to share?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics