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[quote=Anonymous]Mine was like this and just filed for divorce and I truly think it’s because I pushed back about his selfishness plus a touch of mid-life crisis. Mine went from what you’re describing (crabby and selective about which family things he’d deign to participate in) to controlling (forced us to go on vacations he chose or not at all, bullied me into the purchase of a house I didn’t want).

It’s a slippery slope and I think you are doing a good job by recognizing it now. I did see signs here and there when we were dating but nothing was obvious until I looked back at a long pattern of this behavior. It didn’t help that he played Mr. Nice Guy to everyone but me so I thought that maybe I was always seeing things incorrectly.

After watching other dads step up and enjoy the most tedious aspects of family life and kids’ activities for the past decade, and making tons of compromises myself, I’m devastated by the choices my ex DH made and how it impacted the kids.

Even during divorce proceedings he was skipping visitation time to go on trips for his hobby but couldn’t show up for their activities because “traffic will be bad” or “there’s nothing to see from the waiting area.” There was a time when I worried that my (male, also a dad) attorney was going slap him out of sheer frustration at his behavior.[/quote]

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