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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Im sorry for your loss.

If you think it would make your family feel better so see you go up, I would walk up at communion and cross your arms across your chest and receive a blessing, just like kids who haven't gotten their first communion do.

If anyone says anything about it I would respond with something to the effect of "I'm here to support my sister, not discuss my faith."

[/quote]

+1000000

Great line. [/quote]

PP to add something. My mother picked a fight with me at my uncle (her little brother's) funeral. It was about a long-standing point of contention between us that had been long at a stalemate, nothing new or interesting or inflammatory happened or anything. It was just as I was leaving, all of a sudden, she's going off at me about this thing. It was such a crappy way to end an already crappy day.

I was so angry with her about that as I was driving home - and then I realized something. Sadness is a really difficult, exhausting emotion. Sitting in sadness all day, after a week of sadness, is so, so hard. She needed a break from sadness, and chose anger, and I was an easy target. I rebranded that brief blow up as a favor to her. She got to spend a couple hours being mad at me. A break from the sadness. In an odd way, a gift to her. So I just totally let it go.

If one of your relatives decides to give you a really hard time about not taking communion, don't take the bait, defuse, step away. And try and think of it that way - a gift to someone who needed to fixate on SOMETHING that was not the tragic death of a four year old.

Hugs to you and your family. [/quote]

OP here. Thank you for your kind words.

And thank you for sharing your graceful perspective regarding your family's loss.

Reshaping our perspectives can be so, so useful. I will keep what you shared in mind on the day of her service.[/quote]

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