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[quote=Anonymous]Come along with me on a tale of low-stakes neighborhood woes. (Or don't-- if your inclination is to spit vitriol at others to make yourself feel better, please do not read further. Your tired contribution is assumed.)

A nearby house is owned by a family; we were close, but they moved a few hours away during the pandemic, kept the house, and rent it out. I'm better friends with the mom than the dad, and our kids have stayed close (via text, online gaming, and occasional visits.)

The dad, let's call him Bob, has been dealing with a problem renter. I've been helping in very small ways (getting mail delivered to my house so the problem renter doesn't intercept it), and mostly just listening sympathetically. I know the renter to be a jerk, probably with mental health issues, so it's been easy to take Bob's side. Whenever Bob is in town to deal with landlord stuff, we invite him for a meal, catch up on our families, listen to his troubles. Ordinary neighborly stuff. He is here this week and he's invited for dinner tonight.

Last night I heard screaming, looked out the window and saw Bob being totally menacing to another neighbor-- one I know to be pleasant and kind. Top volume, finger in the face, etc. I couldn't make out what he was saying, but the vibes were aggressive and not at all neighborly. Bob doesn't even live here, so I'm not sure why he thinks it's ok to scream at people who do. I'm definitely questioning his poor-me vibe and victim narrative. Anyone who screams at a neighbor like that has to be part of his own problems, right??

So. Tell Bob's wife he's behaving badly? She would never behave like this, and I don't think she'd condone it. Cancel dinner tonight? Carry on like I didn't see it and let the relationship fade? I definitely am not going to stay friendly with someone who's so uncivilized as to scream at someone on the street for the whole neighborhood to hear. 
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