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[quote=Anonymous]What’s normal depends so much on the school. Some private schools are full of snobby parents who view others through the metric of dollar signs and social status. We have kids at two of the Big 3s, and I have never seen a group so obsessed with themselves for so little reason.

We are a two income professional family with an HHI of about $800,000 but it’s been made clear to us that we don’t have the social and political connections that hold cachet in this group. We have many good friends who are not part of the private school world and have little interest in joining the social scene and country clubs that impart status.

In early elementary some families did not greet us until their child decided they wanted to play with ours. Even then conversations were stilted, and in parent only gatherings we would barely be acknowledged. More than once I had a parent walk away abruptly, like literally in the middle of their own sentence, to fawn over someone they considered high status.

It’s the wealthiest families who are secure and could care less about status who are among the warmest. The poors also hang out.

Kids develop their own social status among their peers which is often personality dependent. Two of mine were high status kids. Outgoing, extroverted, creative, smart, and funny. They had no problems establishing themselves. My third child who is also creative, smart, and funny but shy and introverted had a harder time, even being bullied at one point. They are invited to far fewer get togethers. They don’t mind and have found a core group of good friends but some years it’s been tough.
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