Reply to "Considerate without catering" where is the line?

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Reply to ""Considerate without catering" where is the line?"

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[quote=Anonymous]It depends on the kid and the reasons behind their pickness. Some kids have much bigger hills to climb to overcome food aversions. One of my kids has ARFID and she will gag or throw up certain foods because her aversion is so strong. It is not something she's doing to be a brat -- I have watched her try to choke things down out of politeness and it's heartbreaking. It would be like if someone served you a live cockroach and then you tried to eat it so as not to be rude or cause trouble. That's what it's like for her to eat a piece of steak or an omelette.

So what I do for her I'm sure looks like catering to most people but to me it is just kindness. I know how hard she works to expand her food palate. I also know that if I don't make more of an effort for her, she simply will not eat and in fact can just lose her appetite if meals are too stressful or scary, and will start to lose weight. Trust me, you will start to "cater" really quickly if you have a kid who isn't gaining weight or growing and would rather go to bed hungry than eat even something as broadly pleasing as a grilled cheese or a slice of pizza.

This is totally different from a kid who eats a broad range of foods but sometimes acts picky with "ugh I'm tired of spaghetti" or "I can't eat this tortilla, it has too many brown marks on it." A kid like that is in the normal range of pickiness and usually will eat if you just give them food and let them know that's what is for dinner. Also it's okay to eat things that aren't your favorite and kids sometimes need to learn that.

Meanwhile, my child with ARFID almost never eats food that is her favorite and yes sometimes I give her food I know she likes with a meal even if it means making something special because I want her to have positive associations with meals and eating. She's just on a different path than most people.[/quote]

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