Reply to Family member acting fearful after being called out

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Family member acting fearful after being called out—Now what? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]This is a long story that could probably be split into three posts, but I’ll try to keep it concise.

I have a family member who’s always been difficult. During the last two times we were together, she acted out in public in ways that were inappropriate and uncomfortable. After the second incident, I gently brought it up and told her it made me uncomfortable. She didn’t take it well—she cried and abruptly left.
Some time passed, and we eventually agreed to meet for lunch. What followed was the most awkward, uncomfortable interaction I’ve ever had. She wouldn’t make eye contact, barely spoke (just one-word answers), didn’t eat, and fidgeted nonstop. She honestly looked like a scared, wounded animal. I told my husband afterward that it felt like someone had forced her to have lunch with a known criminal.
I didn’t say anything in the moment—it was just too bizarre. Her reaction seems wildly out of proportion to how gently I approached the earlier conversation. The only explanation I can come up with is that she’s embarrassed and trying to shift blame, like “You were so mean to me that I’m now afraid of you.” Or like a form of passive-aggressive punishment, like, “You hurt my feelings, so now I’ll make you uncomfortable, too.”

So now I’m stuck. The elephant in the room clearly needs addressing, but I have no idea how to move forward. How do I approach this? And what could she be trying to achieve with this behavior?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics