Reply to DW with Borderline Personality Disorder? Depression? Bi-polar disorder?

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[quote=Anonymous]I am so sorry for you. My mother was/is like this and it was a very difficult childhood. For years I had NO memories of spending any time with my mother at all--not a single memory of her during my entire childhood. They eventually filtered back through therapy and it was clear to me that her rages, unpredictability, seething anger, etc, were incredibly frightening. I never knew when she would lose it. Sometimes she would sleep for hours and hours, staying in her bedroom while my dad would take us out of the house, sometimes she would rage through the house, or just wander through it talking to herself.  Sometimes she would suddenly throw all the clothes out of my closet onto the floor and scream about how disorganized they were and how she was the only one who ever organized everything (she did not work, we had a LIVE IN housekeeper/nanny even though she did not work, paid for by her parents--that was supposed to be college funds but she couldn't function). And, she made me feel as if it were all my fault. That having kids and marrying my dad had ruined her life (she used to walk around the house muttering angry words like this to herself).She also 'spins out' in paranoid, angry ways. I would get calls out of the blue in college from her, with her screaming about how selfish I was, just like my dad, how Idid everything for "me me me" and she sacrificed everything, etc, etc. Crazy, angry stuff. Ultimately, my parents divorced when I was 15, and I lived alone with her, which was pretty awful. I developed serious anxiety, horrible self esteem and eating disorders in my 20s. Got my shit together in my 30s.

I don't know how it affects your DC, but it does, trust me. Is there a time you can sit down with her when she's calm and lay it out? That you'll do anything n your power to help her, but if she refuses to get psychiatric evaluation, help and follow a regime that you cannot continue living like this and you are worried about how it is affecting your child? will she respond to that? My mother's rages were about not feeling heard--the problem is that nothing, it seemed, could get through to her in her depressed state. [/quote]

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