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[quote=Anonymous]FIL surveys the situation and finds your weakest point and calls attention to it. House is messy or  job isn't great and he says some under the radar comment about it.  If you try to call him on it, he will just continue.

He obsessed with people working or not working. Always has to bring up how I get SOO many breaks as a teacher. He brought up how I had soo many weeks off on maternity leave.

A lot of family issues stem because my BIL will not speak to him and if BIL is at a family event FIL is not invited. So we will be having a dinner and BIL will run out if FIL barges in.

So one Christmas, I ordered a whole foods dinner for 6 for FIL and my family because Christmas is always a trainwreck. We get everything and ready and start setting at 10 am and he has been told a few times we are planning to eat for noon. He just doesn't show up (we are at my in laws house).  His phone is off and he is unreachable. We leave the house at 2:30pm. He returns at 4pm claiming he forgot and found some tourists to eat with at a downtown church service.

For him, there is subtly bullying component of making other feel bad. His personality isn't genuine. It feels like you are talking to an actor. [/quote]

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