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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a couples counselor. I see the couple together for the first session, then I see each person separately for one session so each has a chance to share their feelings and perspective without worrying about how the other will react. All sessions after that are together for the most part.

Things do tend to get worse for awhile before they get better, but not always. It depends on what's happening in the relationship. If couples are avoiding conflict or otherwise not being open with each other, then yes, talking about their problems makes things feel worse for awhile. But they learn how to listen to each other, how to share their feelings without being critical of the other person, and how to work through conflict, and then it gets better.
 
With other couples, if there isn't a lot of conflict or built up resentment, they are often able to work toward gradually getting closer without that difficult period first.

I hope that helps. Contact a couple of therapists via Psychology Today who are in your area and ask them about their process. They should offer a free consult call.[/quote]

Thank you I appreciate that. I'm looking at the budget. How many sessions do you find are typically useful? I'm hopeful in that we're both open to therapy and want to change the dynamic but I'm new to the therapy world and also scared it could worsen things. [/quote]

I have seen clients for as few as 6-8 sessions who have seen improvement, but these are cases where the issues aren't longstanding or deep -- life transitions like having a baby, moving, etc.

I tell most couples to plan for 6-9 months, which is the average I find. Weekly is great but if people have budget issues, then I will definitely work with them to try to make it more affordable. Biweekly can be fine if you're willing to do homework in between sessions.

Also, look into what's covered by your insurance plan(s). Some plans will cover couple's therapy and some won't.[/quote]

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