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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom is high functioning ASD as is her entire family. I could answer questions from that perspective if you want. [/quote]
How was her temperament when raising you? If there were executive function issues how did it manifest in your childhood?

Thanks in advance I’m not OP BTW.[/quote]

She had a very short fuse, likely due to sensory issues. She would explode in rage often. Luckily I was an only child and a quiet girl so there wasn't a lot to trigger her. I don't think she could have coped with more kids.

The real problem was lack of emotional attunement. When you can't get that from your mother it obviously has a lasting (negative) effect. When I was upset about something she just couldn't understand it and offered no comfort. I learned quickly that she was not a safe place to discuss my feelings or emotions. For example I've never once had a conversation with her about my love life.

My dad was a pretty good father and the primary parent which helped. They are still married but have a very rocky relationship, it's very hard to be married to someone who can't reciprocate emotional vulnerability.

She lives near me and sees my kids but I am very careful about the time they spend with her. She has zero frame of reference for what is and is not appropriate for kids and will say some really inappropriate things. When I was a kid I was allowed to watch whatever tv I wanted, stuff like that. She'll discuss really dark topics in front of my kids. She's not a warm and fuzzy grandma to say the least.

I will say there are good things about her. Work is the one way she can connect with me so she has always been very supportive of my career. We have one common interest and bond over that. She's great about helping me with any financial issues. She's really smart, she has economics degrees from top five universities.

Over all it was hard way to grow up but lots of people have bad moms. She wasn't abusive. Just volatile and hard to connect with. [/quote]

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