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[quote=Anonymous]Right there with you, OP. We've been bugging my parents for several years to make some plans. Or at least express some preferences beyond &quot;we'd like to die right here.&quot;

And then my dad had a stroke, and we inquired about where she would like him to do the necessary residential rehab. Nothing. If they were on any AL waitlists. No. Where she might like to [i]get on [/i]a waiting list in case dad can't safely come home? No idea.

What really makes me mad is that all their friends are old and well-off like them, so they've been watching people go through this aging process for years now, and despite our gentle pleas to give it some thought, apparently never connected their own age to what their friends were doing (getting sick, choosing and moving to ALs, needing PT/ rehab, etc etc.) My mom will yammer endlessly about the health issues of people I've never met, but when asked about her and my dad's long term needs and wants? It's like I asked her to solve a quantum physics problem.

Oh and the house. They've been asking me to take things forever. I live in a small city house with a family. The two of them have 3x the square footage. WTF am I going to do with a grand piano?? If the piano is keeping you up nights, sell it. There's not going to be some magic change in my circumstances where I acquire space for a grand piano, no matter how much you loved hearing me play it as a kid. I hate that I am going to have to dig them out of a lifetime of accumulating. It's a bad hobby to begin with. And 90% of it is going in a landfill. So it's not just bad for my sanity, it's going to poison future generations.

BUT-- and I don't know about you-- I'm already not doing that to my kids. Like I said, we have a small house, and I am aggressive about not accumulating clutter. I don't impulse buy. Nothing gets to come home with me just because it's &quot;cute.&quot; If I set foot in a department store or discount store, it is in search of something specific, and if that thing isn't there, I walk out with nothing. I make regular trips to Goodwill instead of stockpiling outgrown clothes for... what? Why?? Why did they keep all this crap?  &gt;:(

Oof, sorry. I guess I had some stuff to unload. But to reiterate, I'm sorry OP. This sucks and they should have been more considerate of the mess they'd leave us. Let's you and me do better. :) [/quote]

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