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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My sister is going through it and has spent a lot of time calling, complaining, etc. She is a pretty negative person and it's fairly consistent. She complains about her husband, she complains about the demands of her kids, she complains about working, she complained when she was home with small kids, she complained that her husband didn't want her to be home full time because he didn't think it was a good fit, etc.

She has anxiety and ADHD in attentive, I think. She refuses help for both. No to medication. No to therapy.

Her kids are teenagers now and they....don't like her? They avoid her, prefer dad (because in her words "he's a 'effin bus diver to all of their activities, they are so overscheduled, we can't even eat dinner together."). She won't let them have friends over because their house is a mess...which isn't really true. I mean, it's a house and they have weekly cleaners, and yes, people live there but it's not a hoarder house like she makes it sound.

Her kids are good kids. They seem to work hard, get good grades, do activities, seem nice whenever I see them, etc. Her husband does...a lot. He works remotely so he's the one doing driving and stuff but he's just seems like the kids go to. From my time with their family (I live in the same area and we get together regularly), they basically all work around my sister's dark cloud.

How do I gently explain...she's the problem here. If everyone is avoiding you and working around your moods, it might be you who might need to adjust to bring them back into your orbit?[/quote]

If it were my sister I'd just say it. "Larla, I'm far from perfect. But if I'm hearing you right - your family is walking on eggshells around you, and that must suck for them. Are you ok? You seem like Eeyore lately, everything is terrible. Maybe talking to a professional would help."

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