Reply to Mom pretends she doesn't have cancer

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[quote=Anonymous]You might not be able to change her and need to focus instead on just letting go and enjoying the time you have together.

My dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at 74. They gave him 6 months and recommended hospice but he wasn’t ready to die and fought it hard. When he got to the other side of the fight he pretty much said f it - if I’m dying soon, I want to live life on my terms. He started smoking cigars again (had mostly given those up decades before) and drank way too much. Was it hard to watch? Yeah. Was it worth wasting the time on arguing with him? No.

He ended up dying at 80 of a heart attack. The drinking and smoking I’m sure contributed to it - but he had been clear for years that he had little interest in growing very old and infirm and my family was all pretty at peace with how he went since we knew its what he chose and how he wanted to live out his last years. Nothing made the man happier than drinking a scotch on his porch smoking a cigar and grilling up a big steak. I would have loved more time with him but that’s the path he chose and I think we were all able to enjoy his last years more because we accepted that.[/quote]

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