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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If this is the second visit, what happened during the first visit? Did they expect to be catered to? Surely they didn't expect a brand new mom to wait on them.

If they didn't expect to be waited on, then assume that will continue.

I do think it's harder for ILs to learn to work around the house. Your parents are close by and well acquainted with what you like and need. You through your DH needs to help with the learning curve for his parents.

[b]Also, if you push your ILs away, resentment will grow that your parents get more of the baby's time, and distance will happen. 
[/b]
Come up with the specifics of what you want, then go from there.

You could also mention them getting an Airbnb close by and come more often, but not stay with you, to be more like your parents.[/quote]

AND THAT'S FINE. Why do people assume post-partum mothers must take on all the burden and that temporary distance from certain unhelpful people is socially unacceptable? That's an outrageous thought on your part, PP, actually. It's too bad if OP's in-laws are the type to not give grace to a new mother. Every birth is different. What happened in the past is not a predictor of the future. It's perfectly fine if OP doesn't feel like hosting. She should not host. And if her husband is too chicken to tell his parents, it's perfectly acceptable for a mother to have the courage of her opinions and tell people to shove off (nicely).

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