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[quote=Anonymous]At 13/14 we had the same issue. We put our foot down and communicated that there’s no scenario where having friends who violate people’s property are aloud. We further told our goal as parents is to raise productive members of society, surrounding themselves with people who are liabilities reflect a lack of character on their part. Yes, our approach is a bit overbearing, but that kid did stop hanging out with the loser kids and have mostly toed the line.

However, I’m sure both my kids have experimented here and there as they don’t live in a bubble, but they were always mindful of disappointing us. Recently, my youngest one, 22, told me he was going to Miami with a college friend for spring break. The friend has a high roller uncle in Miami with a beach house in South Beach and gets chauffeured around in limos. I’ve spend time in south beach and know those types, so I said, no way is that acceptable, that someone like that in South Beach would likely be involved in all kinds of nefarious things, including drugs. It was judgy of me and he blew his top at me and didn’t speak to me for a month. Other family members cautioned him about the trip as well - he ended up not going on the trip - it takes a village. Culturally, we can get away with offering unsolicited and unwelcome advice to our kids without them hating us. Our approach may not work for you, but you still have to communicate your family boundaries. That is, as parents some of the expectations you have of them is that, they choose friends of character, that don’t vandalize and violate people[/quote]

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