Reply to Do any parents out there know their kids are the mean ones?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a younger sibling girl who I can see that she can have mean tendencies.  I talk to her about it a lot and did since she was young and we hold her accountable at home.  She can be verbally mean and sometimes use humor in a way that isn't kind.  She is definitely more of an alpha personality than her older sibling.  Some of it is birth order I think.  The younger siblings are often just tougher than the first kid too.

A lot of social pecking order in middle school is kids are afraid of the kids who are willing to go the furthest in terms of meanness and so these kids can temporarily achieve some type of "popularity" which is really just a weird kind of power that is toxic.  Most kids know better and it's not their natural personality to be over the top mean.  They might stand there and not object.  But they know it's wrong.  But they don't want the really mean kids to turn on them and be on the receiving end.

By high school, the kids do a better job of shutting down the really mean kids.  I think peer feedback and strife is what really gets a kid in check more than what parents say or do.[/quote]

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