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[quote=Anonymous]Thinking of things that make you feel good about your parenting, not necessarily your kid. So feeling satisfied you made a good parenting choice, not just feeling pride at your kid succeeding in some way.

Recently at a park, I was letting my middle elementary kids play on their own but sitting at a picnic table about 30 ft from the playground/field area, where I could see them but give them space. This is something we've been experimenting with because our kids have started to ask to go to the playground down the street on their own and they are still too young (legally too young and also socially -- most people don't their kids go play without parents until at least 4th grade). So to work on independence, we take them and sit close enough to intervene if something really serious is going on, but where they can kind of forget we're there and figure stuff out on their own. Well after about 30 minutes I see this other mom I know from the neighborhood marching over and I was certain she was going to yell at me for not supervising more closely, but then she walked up and said, "You're a smart one, I need to start giving my kids more space too. We don't need to hover at this age." It was such a relief to get validation on that because there are so many conflicting messages between people who seem to think you should keep kids within arms length until college, versus people who think it's "coddling" because I still sometimes hold my 7 yr old's hand when crossing the street.

This morning I was checking my daughter in at a new sports league and the woman at the check in table said "oh I looooove her name." It's such a small thing but I find it thrilling when people compliment my child's name in a way that you can tell is genuine. I felt intense pressure in selecting a name and while I too love the names we picked, I have had moments of wondering if others will like them as much as I do. It's so gratifying when they do.[/quote]

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