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[quote=Anonymous]My parents are both 80ish so no age gap but my mother is aging much slower than my father. My father's aging is accelerated by Parkinsons. Physically my mother is perfectly healthy. She has ADHD and as she ages, she is becoming increasingly scattered and I am not sure where the line is between her ADHD and mild dementia. But she is adament that she is perfectly healthy in every way. She refuses to accept my father's decline and tears a strip off him for being lazy and not keeping up with her. She refuses all help for both of them. She doesn't really maintain the house or property well anymore but it is still sufficient that it isn't a safety risk. Their house is not suitable for my father but she refuses to even entertain the thought of moving.

Other than spending more time at their place to help out, I am at a loss as to what to do. She is just in denial about a lot of things and won't even discuss them. My father would move tomorrow or accept extra help if he had any say as he is really struggling but he doesn't get a say. And when she rips into him, then he just says he is happy to do whatever she wants. [/quote]

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