Reply to husband and I handle disagreements differently. Need serious advice

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When my husband and I get into arguments, he shuts down and says he needs space and time. So, he ignores me all day (I do not reach out to him because I know he will not respond and will take it as me disrespecting what he needs). I get no phone call, no text, he wont be in the same room as me at home, will interact with the kids in front of me but will not speak or look or interact with me. This can go on for a day, sometimes 2. It hurts me so much. [b]I am the type that if there is a disagreement or argument, I want to handle it right then and there. I can not take being someones wife and being ignored.[/b] I know that we are both not right yet not right for our needs but how do we cope? [b]I told him [/b]many times, it is ok to take a break but [b]I need [/b]reassurance when you decide to do that. For instance, [b]tell me you love me but you are hurt and need space but will get back to me in two hours. [/b]He does not say or do that. He says, "I need to protect and handle me first." "I can not be there for you if I am not there for me." Please do not suggest therapy. We tried, we failed, and that option is no longer on the table. I dont even care if you tell me that I am at fault, but someone, please help me. I can not take this.[/quote]
Why are you dictating how he responds to your fights? He is allowed to process in his own way without you telling him how to behave. He’s your husband not your child. [/quote]

OP here and I get that. He processes by shutting down and I process by talking it out. What is the middle ground that makes us both have our needs met?[/quote]

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