Reply to 4th grader isolated at school and in group settings

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For my kid, this feeling of being excluded, that didn't match what others were observing, was an early sign of depression and anxiety which can be triggered by hormones as kids approach puberty.

It could be that she's being excluded in subtle ways and people aren't seeing it.  But it could also be something internal to her. [/quote]

I think this is very good advice. It could be that she is being excluded, but it could also be that she thinks she is being excluded even though she isn't. Can you volunteer at lunch or on a field trip in the near future (some slightly unstructured school time, so that you can see the dynamics)? Can you talk to the moms of some of the friends who she plays well with? Don't do it from a "is your DD excluding mine" perspective, but rather from a "my DD seems really unhappy at school and I'm struggling to figure out why; she really likes your DD and they play so well together, so I thought maybe your DD would have some insight into what's happening." You need more external information about what is really happening.

If this is really a queen bee being mean to/encouraging others to bully your DD thing, then all the normal advice would apply (1-on-1 playdates with others, moving classes or even schools, etc), but it might not be that at all. If it's not that, the advice is entirely different.[/quote]

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