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[quote=Anonymous]My MIL lives in the Midwest in a house she own with her son, who has some mental health issues that seem to be getting worse. Her other son is my DH and this situation has him stressed.

MIL’s memory has gone downhill recently. She has lost a lot of short term memory and is living in a semi hoarder situation with BIL. We will likely need to move her into memory care soon but what do we do with mentally ill BIL?

Wr have tried to get him help via several state agencies but he won’t participate or engage with them (won’t answer their calls or respond  to emails) and since he’s an adult we can’t force him to do anything.

Can he live in an assisted living facility with her? We have bid idea how any of this works and we don’t know where he would go if she needed memory care. She owns her house outright, but it would need to be sold for her care. He has a PT job but doesn’t pay or contribute to any bills. She still makes his lunch.

Where do you even begin with a situation like this? I am trying to get ahead of it but I fear an emergency is coming our way soon. What happens if she falls and has to go into assisted living ? [/quote]

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