Reply to Ex forcing son to attend events with new partner

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That's not unreasonable that he spend the time with his dad if his dad is supporting him after 18.  You can always pay for college yourself or he can pay if he doesn't want a relationship.  Simple.[/quote]

He's obligated to pay by our divorce degree. We both pay child support to son in proportion to our income, child support is legally till age 21 in my state. The issue is that dad threatens not to follow the legal agreements if son is not doing what he wants him to do. If exH doesn't prepay tuition for next semester, I would end up in court collecting it.

I am actually the one financially interested here in their good relationship and who insisted on 50/50 time split on college breaks. I'm dating, too and need some time for myself. Grown up kids are expensive and child support is minimal.

But I feel like a shitty mother for "selling" my son to the person he doesn't want to have anything in common. I am thinking long term: exH is much older, he will be gone in 20 years or so. Our son is a sole heir and in trusts of a multi-mullion estate. [/quote]

Your son can't live like this. First it's see his dad 50% of the time. Then it's see dad + this woman. Then it's see dad + this woman + you have to be nice. It's always going to be something hanging over his head and then dad will threaten not to pay. You can't have a healthy relationship that way. He's an adult and can't be forced to do visitation.

If he doesn't pay you do have the mechanism to take your ex to court and enforce the order. And that's what you'll have to do. The way it's heading, your son will cut all contact the second he graduates. If your son is allowed to make choices, and see his dad on his own terms, they might actually have a better relationship. But yes, that means son might be disinherited from millions. That's his choice.

I[/quote]

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