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[quote=Anonymous]I used to be in the nurture camp but I think I am more in the nature camp now after having two sons who are complete opposites despite being raised in the same household. Their differences were so readily apparently from day 1.

I now try to live by two principles: first, that though I might not be able to influence much or anything in my kids life, the one aspect I can probably influence is my relationship with them. So I will help them with school or whatever they need because I want them to know that I will always be there for them and won't let them flounder and fail. But I try to remember not to put anything ahead of the relationship so I try not to force activities or benchmarks/expectations.

I saw this wonderful TED talk once that talked about nature vs nurture. Her conclusion from research and lived experience is that parents absolutely do influence their children, but just not in a way you can predict, just like how different people can take away drastically different conclusions from the same experience. So parent for today and not for some future goal. [/quote]

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