Reply to birthday disappointment and I'm feeling sorry for myself.

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[quote=Anonymous]Happy birthday! And I'm sorry - that does sound tough. And I'd be disappointed too in your shoes.

Can you say to your husband now "I know I said I didn't want a party, but this birthday is a big one and I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by it and realizing now I would have like something bigger to mark it. Can we do something to celebrate this next chapter in my life? Do you think you help plan that for/with me?"

Maybe that's a fancy dinner or overnight somewhere with DH. Maybe it's getting the teenagers to cheerful feign excitement about going out to a play or concert with you or a slightly more indulgent vacation than you'd usually take. Maybe it's a weekend away with a couple girlfriends. It's not too late! Even if you don't doing much, usually for me just talking through disappointment with DH makes me feel better and able to move on. It sounds like you can approach it in a non-accusatory way (taking some of the blame for not being clearer which you did in your post) which is great. 
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