Reply to I Opened Pandora's Box

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[quote=Anonymous]Op here.  He contacted me to apologize. He's not married and he didn't know that I was married.

I was reading an article with Jill Scott and she talked about being "dickmatized". She said it's when the sex is so amazing that you are outside in the daytime with a flashlight looking for that man. That's ex for me.

I have puts lots of effort into improving that aspect of my marriage, but it hasn't worked. I've tried talking,being specific, buying books, etc. He's just the type that wants to just lay there. He'll participate if I start it off- but I have to put in most of the work. He's not interested in any toys or anything as that is a turn off to him. It hasn't been important because I love my husband. And I know he loves me. He makes me feel so loved all of the time...but not necessarily "wanted" in a sexual way.

I love him so much that I have actually been crying
about this because I feel guilty. How can I look
him in the face knowing that I've had such terrible thoughts?

I feel like I should apologize to him and ask for forgiveness. I didn't "do" anything, but in my mind I did. I should have known better than to even respond. I feel terrible.

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