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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The truth is that some parents are always offering based on their own motivations and if I don’t reciprocate at the same level, I am willing to accept the consequences.

Eg - one set of parents always want to host sleepovers, like every weekend. Personally I hate them and don’t like to host. If the fact that I don’t reciprocate means they stop having sleepovers, fine by me.

Another mom is always planning elaborate events as part of her competitive parenting efforts with her ex spouse. She is also crazy. If she views me as a taker and stops including my kid, then that’s fine too. These kids are now in high school, so they can plan their own activities anyway. [/quote]

You don't have to reciprocate in kind. You can reciprocate in some other way.[/quote]

People get embarrassed though. If you are always very elaborate and spend a ton when you host then people may not feel comfortable reciprocating in a way that might make them feel judged.

If you care a lot about things being reciprocal then you might want to consider hosting and treating people in a way that makes it possible for them to reciprocate at vaguely the same level. This is part of etiquette too actually. Instead of hosting an elaborate catered party with professional decorations try inviting people over for pizza and a movie. They are much more likely to reciprocate that because (1) they can and (2) that invite makes it feel like you actually want to hang out with them and aren't just showing off.[/quote]

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