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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I understand how you feel. It's incredibly disorienting to lose your last parent. My mother died when I was young, and my father died a decade ago. I still forget my father is gone, and I actually talk to my mother sometimes, even more than 30 years after she died. I don't think you ever lose that connection to your parents. I miss them both very much, and wish they were here to get to know their grandchildren.

I think you can count your blessings, first that your mom had time to get to know your children. Please encourage your children to talk with someone they trust about your mother. You should also. Don't try talking to your friends who have never lost a parent. They can't possibly understand. Find someone who can help you get through this, a counselor of some sort. I wouldn't go to a grief group, but that's me. I'm sure it can help. Counseling over the phone can't be very helpful, but it's probably better than nothing.

I'm sorry, I'm not being very helpful here. You will feel better in time, but it takes about a year before you begin to right your ship, so to speak. In the old days people in mourning wore black or at least black armbands for a full year after the loss of someone close to them. I think it's a custom we ought to bring back.

Dealing with my dad's estate was very painful, and ended up causing a rift with my brother, which added another loss to grieve. Focus on what you have, and not on what you've lost. You had your mom for many years, and you are lucky in that. You will feel better in time, but it's a loss you'll never "get over." You'll just learn to live with it. [/quote]

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