Reply to DD behavior issues at school-- advice needed!

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[quote=Anonymous]DD, a younger sibling, tested into AAP this year, and is at the LLIV center (e.g., she did not have to change schools-- in fact several of her closest friends are in class with her).  Unfortunately, FCPS AAP overcrowding has hit her school, and there are more than 30 kids in her classroom.  Also, the regular teacher (who taught DS and is fantastic) is on maternity leave until mid November, and the replacement is so so.

DD is very social with a high EQ, and is highly creative.  Accordingy to all her testing, including a WISC, her past work, and our observations, she is academically capable of doing the work.  However, DD can also be lazy, esp. if she thinks the work is boring (think spelling and multiplication tables) and frustrates/gets easily upset, and has "meltdowns".  She also  likes to play the younger sibling card-- asking for DS' help before she gives her best effort.  Most concerning to us, DD also tends to have mood swings-- she is very happy one minute and very angry the next based on what seem to be small triggers.  She has always had trouble adjusting the first few weeks of a new school year, but has never been a school behavior problem.  However, we have heard from DD's guidance counselor that her behavior has become a problem this year.  Apparently, DD is not disrupting class, and does not throw temper tantrums, or act violently (throwing, hitting, etc.) but  she does get upset and teary when she does not feel she can do the work, or that a classmate isn't being fair (e.g. is not sharing supplies).

When we see these behaviors at home, (often when DS, who is much larger, teases her, or when she does not want to to homework or chores) we ask her to go to her room until she feels that she can be a civilized member of family and apologize the the person she lost her temper with.  The guidance counselor said she would work with DD and 3-4 other kids in class having similar problems, but we are at a loss as to what to do at home to support the school.  It is tempting to move her into a Gen Ed classroom, but I'm afraid this will just reinforce her bad behavior and allow her to get away with "coasting" academically, which won't help in the long run. Eventually, she will reach a point where schoolwork is challenging, and we would like to give her good coping skills.

I would love any ideas/ suggestions on how to handle this.  Also, it would be great to hear from anyone who has had a child professionally evaluated for issues like DD's as to whether this was worthwhile.   Finally, it would be great if someone could suggest a referral in the Vienna, Falls Church, Fairfax area.  I am not even sure what type of assistance I should be looking for: psychiatrist or psychologist, and if psychologist, what type (occupational, child/play, CBT, etc).  I am very opposed to medicating an 8 year old, but am concerned about the mood swings and could really use some guidance.

Thanks in advance[/quote]

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