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[quote=Anonymous]I am so sorry OP. It will depend on your resources. If you are wealthy, I would hire an aide for 4 hrs a day as soon as possible so your spouse gets used to having someone else in the home. It is helpful to do this before the decline is too acute, because it can seem harder to accept the farther they are into cognitive decline.

Even if your spouse doesn't want them around, use them as a mother's helper or extra set of eyes. This will also help to give you bandwidth to do the things below--especially your therapist and a care navigator.

Get your spouses personal and financial information --login, accounts, health care portal. See a lawyer about durable power of attorney.

Get yourself a therapist. Prioritize this over anything else.

Look at what your job offers as an employee benefit. Eg, caregiving leave, child/elder care backup services, counseling, referrals, financial consulting.

You may want to meet with a care navigator, even if it feels early, just to get a professionals view. I like looking up aging life care association for members since they are independent (not paid thru referrals).

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