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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Say more about why you feel sad/bad. Do you feel that you betrayed your husband? Do you feel that you put too much of your private life out there?

Honestly, the biggest red flag to me of your post is that you posted online and clearly indicated that you were married and some dude started DMing you under the auspice of giving you advice, when it’s clear that he was flirting and would’ve taken it further if you allowed it. That’s a predator. I’m not saying like a child molester who was gonna drive across the country and grab you, I’m saying a garden variety guy with bad intentions who would’ve ended up being a bad presence in your life. It seems like you don’t quite recognize it. That’s what you were involved in, and that probably bears some thought. People like that guy have a divining rod for vulnerability. There’s nothing wrong with being vulnerable, but you have to be aware of what it means to put it out there and how to protect yourself. If that doesn’t feel like a skill that you have either at this moment or at this stage of life, you may also want to consider what that means about you or about your marriage, in terms of what needs a repair.[/quote]

Thanks for this. It all seemed pretty innocent at initially, but in reflection he clearly was testing waters/boundaries and did want more info about me. Kinda “predatory” even if not overtly.

I feel (maybe felt… actually starting to get more reassured now!) sad/bad because I was clearly feeling very vulnerable and this random guy provided something I couldn’t get with my partner! What does that say about me? My marriage?? I have talked to my husband about this and he was generally great and we are trying to work on it, but mostly it was the fact that in the moment I thoroughly enjoyed this getting to know you, new flirty back and forth and then felt super sad when it stopped. I felt guilty about feeling sad for the loss of it (like what the hell is wrong with me/my marriage that I felt that way?!)

But I appreciate your post as it takes some off me. Going to try and add some “newness” and fun stuff with partner and also reach out to my actual friends more for and sort of companionship that I felt lacking.

I think I am on the right track! [/quote]

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