Reply to Am I insane to be TTC when my first child is 9?

Forum Index » Infertility Support and Discussion

Reply to "Am I insane to be TTC when my first child is 9?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I have a just turned 14 yr old, a 2.5yr old, and a 6 mo old.  We have been very careful to expect no help in childcare or basic care from the 14 year old when it comes to the babies. He loves to play with each of them but does it 99% on his own terms.  Twice in the 2.5 year old's life, when she was going through very stable sleep stages, we had the him stay with her 8-11 while we went to a movie and he got to watch a movie of his own, order a pizza and hang on his own.  She didnt wake up either of those times and we paid him for babysitting.  He consistently initiates contact with both the toddler and the baby without any prompting at all.  I love this because it cancels out his 14 year old quiet moody stuff and we get a glimpse of the happy boy thing while he interacts with them. I also think it has been really wonderful to watch him realizing that all of the loving routines we do with the little ones are ones we did with him. He remembers the way we used to put lotion on him before bed, the song we sang, the game we played to get suntan lotion on at the beach, etc. At a time in his life where he is naturally breaking away a bit and finding some independence, he is also getting daily reminders of how much we have loved him and still do. This has been the best part for me to watch as a mom.  
It is tricky sometimes to handle the logistics with all of them, and it would be easy to lean on the 14 year old for help or not give him the parenting he still needs ( and says he doesnt of course!) but if you can manage all of that, I say go for it! 
I would also just say that having a toddler and a teenager ( which I think you would have) is emotionally exhausting some days.  There have been days where neither of them made any sense at all - like irrational boundary pushing hormonal stuff....these are not good days.  So I have a glass of wine handy on these days.  I dont think everyone thinks about this possibility.  I know I didnt!!  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics