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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Continue until it doesn't work for you anymore.[/quote]

And then what, dump him? Maybe dump him if -- and it's an "if" and not a "when" as far as anyone knows -- he needs help or care? How self-centered and cynical.

OP, if you actually love the person he is, and he's someone with whom you love spending your time, well, you likely woudn't be asking about whether to be in a committed relationship; you would be saying, he's my person and i'm his, and we'll live in the moment together, and I'll be there for him as he changes over time--as he'll be there for me. So which is it? Are you more scared of [i]someday[/i] in a totally unknown future having to date again? Or are you more invested in this person as the one you want to be with?

It's not quite the same but anyway, OP: 
My relative lost her husband very suddenly due to a medical emergency and it devastated her. She found a great new guy (a little older, but no, nowhere near as big a gap as your BF) a few years later and they began dating seriously. Were talking about moving in together. He suddenly found out he had a serious form of cancer -- he'd seemed in excellent health up to that moment of diagnosis. According to the thinking of some DCUM people, she should have dumped him immediately and been so glad she'd "dodged a bullet" and didn't have to care for him, possibly deal with another death, he hadn't moved in, she could jump back into dating easily since she's pretty and thin...etc.

Nope, she fully recognized the risks and they moved in together, and she's by his side through his treatments. Because they love each other fully and aren't just focused on what DCUM seems to fear so badly-- "What if I have to be a caregiver, what if I'm left without a significant other, what if I have to date again at some future point" blah blah.[/quote]

Not a relative was it? This seems personal. Good for her. [/quote]

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