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Reply to "Loving father but abusive husband - how to support my mom?"
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[quote=Anonymous]I'm an only child who had a nice and loving childhood. My father was a wonderful dad, but he has always been horrible to my mother. Belittling her, gaslighting her, emotional and financial abuse. He had a terrible childhood himself and I suspect his father treated his mother in much the same way. He's only 67 and in excellent physical health, but he's quickly succumbed to dementia. My mother (70) has had to give up her job to look after him full time, which sounds exhausting and miserable. He's often absolutely horrible to her, refusing to speak to her for days, blaming her for everything (he was also like this when he was well). I've tried to encourage her to get help and look after herself, but she brushes off my suggestions. How can I offer more specific suggestions that she might take up? I can't offer any in-person help as I emigrated many years ago and live overseas with my young family. [/quote]
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