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[quote=Anonymous]	No, op, your jealousy is not irrational. I’d not be pleased if my husband went away for a week to celebrate a friend who snidely told me “you can bring the kid”. Your husband should have told his pal “I’m glad you’re turning 50, I really am, I can’t make this party” and left it at that. 
For those wondering why op doesn’t need to be the “cool wife”, she didn’t get married to stay home while the husband celebrated. She didn’t get married to have friends treat her like a servant, you’re good enough to do the grunt work out of sight, we trust you to handle everything while husband is gone, but we don’t actually want you here. Husband needs to understand what is happening and stand up for his wife. 
Also,, social media will remind op of how she didn’t get to go  on this trip. It’s one thing to not go on a trip and then look at slides 1970 style while drinking some good wine, it’s another to look at Facebook at fun cat pictures and then see “Jack was tagged in a memory” and it’s the trip you didn’t get to go on. It’s real easy to hang onto resentment when you have the little things in marriage that annoy us all and then see something that reminds you of a big thing you didn’t get to do. 
I’d tell your husband you’d prefer he not go on the trip, or you both go and bring the kid if you want. Your husband married you, not his buddy. He needs to remember that and he needs to tell his friend either the polite version of “can’t make it” or “I don’t appreciate the comment towards my wife that the kid can come but not really, and I *really* don’t appreciate you expecting my wife to stay home while I do a fun trip without her”. Either of those should straighten the friend out if he’s a good guy. [/quote]

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