Reply to Angry at sibling for abdicating her role

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[quote=Anonymous]I posted about this a while ago. My mother chose a CCRC near Sister 1 about 5 years ago. Three miles away from her.  It was the best option available at the time. Apparently she put down $175k. Two+ years later she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.

Sister 2 and I each live at least 1.5 hours away.  Well, S1 decided last fall to move 800 miles away for no apparent reason. They didn’t have jobs, the schools there are worse, etc. Nothing about it makes sense. It’s possible S1 was tired of taking care of mom, but she only ever asked us for help at the very last minute. We all have kids 13 & under, jobs, etc. so it was impossible to drop everything for a day trip just to run mom to a doctor appt unless we had notice well in advance.

S1 moved in the last month and all hell broke loose. Mom fell, is in the nursing unit and now we have to move her again into assisted living. I spent 4 hours in the rain and horrible beltway traffic last weekend going up there. Everything about the trip was miserable.

Oh and did I mention that when S1 told us she was moving, she essentially dropped everything having to do with mom?

I am livid with my sister for just dumping this on us for no reason. It would have been easier to accept if she had even bothered to acknowledge what a massive burden she was dumping on us that is logistically a nightmare. Or if there had even been a job relocation. We have already looked into moving mom, but she can’t afford to move. Her deposit has fully amortized. So we (S2 and I) are screwed.

Mom is confused often, and depressed. I probably had the most distant relationship with her of the three of us and I have little desire to visit more than once a quarter, though I do try to call every other week.

AITA for wanting to b14ch out my sister?  I am so angry.[/quote]

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