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[quote=Anonymous]TW: living child

I know this is the infertility forum and many don't even have one living child so please delete in inappropriate.

I'm 36.5F, ttc our second living child. Originally I started ttc our first at the start of 2020, nothing for nine cycles, one chemical pregnancy, nothing again for three cycles and then I conceived our first baby which we had to TFMR at 15 weeks because half his skull was missing. 
Then back to trying (with mandatory extra large dose of folate to prevent another neural tube defect pregnancy). Nothing for two months, another chemical pregnancy, then another two months of nothing before I had a laparoscopy for endo and then immediately conceived our living daughter. In amongst all this I saw multiple fertility specialists, had multiple invasive tests, tried every vitamin and other stuff out there.

My pregnancy with our daughter was filled with anxiety and grief. She was born June 2022 and in Dec 2023 we decided to start trying again. I had a chemical pregnancy from that cycle and then back to the drawing board for three more unsuccessful cycles (tbh I didn't really try on the right dates because I was equally scared of being pregnant as not being pregnant.)

Now it's 7dpo in my current cycle and like a psychopath I am testing already and it's negative.

Just hate this and don't know if I can stomach this bullshit to get a second living child.

Thanks so much for reading if you got through all this. I know we're so lucky to even have one healthy child. [/quote]

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