Reply to “Aren’t you lonely?”

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[quote=Anonymous]I had a therapist constantly insist that I felt lonely but the only thing that gives me respite is time alone and there is always someone placing a demand on my time. Even if it's a pleasant hangout with friends, it's still taxing because I just want alone time and I want it often. Someone is usually visiting on the weekend or there are kids activities and coordinating play dates, I often feel like I don't get a chance to breathe except when the kids are at school. Maybe because I am a sahm she wanted to be so insistent about that? People see the world with their own desires/goals/purpose and assume others do too. To hear friends talk, I am 100% sure we view the world differently and it's informed by the way we are raised, our experiences, priorities and our politics. I feel a lot of bad feelings like anger, depression, fear, shame, guilt, self pity, doubt, second thoughts and many more but there are a couple that are rare (like years can go by): loneliness and envy. Being with friends is fun, energizing and leaves me with satisfaction but nothing compares to time alone and it often feels like the world is conspiring to take that from me. I could say that until I'm blue in the face and some people just don't get it.
I have friends who claim they never have doubts because they make a decision and stick to it, and that seems impossible but I know they are built so differently that I believe them. I don't insist that they have to be consumed with doubt, especially if they have a good life.[/quote]

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