Reply to Need guidance for child's invitations to Bar/Bat Mitzvahs

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[quote=Anonymous] Is it expected or assumed that my daughter would attend all events, only some? attend all events. she can leave the lunch and the party early, but not the service
- If attending the full day isn't an option, is it offensive to say that my daughter could only come to some portion of the events? (I am very concerned about inadvertently being offensively clueless.)  It is a dick move to only attend the party and not attend the service. If you can only attend one thing, it should be the service.
- Should I assume that a parent would be included in the invitation, or just my daughter? absolutely not. whoever the invite is addressed to is exactly who is invited.
- If my daughter attends the service and lunch (in addition to the party), what do I need to know about appropriate dress, what to expect, how to be respectful/appropriate during the events?  She can follow the lead of the best-behaved kids there, and she'll be fine. Her dress should cover her shoulder and ass (and then some, ideally) and not show any cleavage. any color is fine. surely she hasn't been raised in a barn and you've taught her how to be respectful when others are talking? she should do that. 
- Is there a customary gift? yes, money. [/quote]

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