Reply to Concerned about Lack of Interest in Extracurricular Activities: what did I do wrong?

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[quote=Anonymous]I hear you, OP. By the time they were 11, I had enrolled my twin DDs in soccer, art classes, crafting clubs, drama classes, foreign language class, cooking classes, a children’s chorus, Girl Scouts, ballet classes, programming classes, science club, many different summer camps, you name it. They were enrolled in orchestra and choir in elementary school. They were safety patrols and helped with recycling. I always encouraged them to try different things until they found something they enjoyed. I really thought they’d have a talent for something that would get them hooked on an activity. I was wrong. They never enjoyed 90% of it. I practically begged them to try any sport or club in middle school and they refused.

One of them is involved in a few activities in high school that aren’t big time commitments and she’s starting a new club at her school. Her activities are primarily driven by just trying to come up with something to put on college applications. The other one is socially awkward and feels like she doesn’t fit in. She was only interested in being in theatre crew (got shot out because there weren’t as many spots as kids who applied), Model UN (has found it boring) and a teen improv class (total bust; she wanted to do comedic improvisation and it was just acting techniques with zero comedy). She’s not currently in any activities.

I tried, but my kids are just not “joiners.” If that’s their personality, there’s not a lot you can do. Forcing activities against their will just makes them determined to hate the activity. All you can do is encourage them to try new things and keep offering opportunities.[/quote]

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