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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like this doesn't work for you, even on the nights where things are calm and you can call. What doesn't work is the expectation and the ability to call every single day. When it doesn't work, your resentment flares. As Brene Brown says, better to create boundaries than resentments. When you're not mad, call your Dad, tell him how much you love him, but that it's not going to be possible for you to call every day. Then let him know what does work (e.g., we'll call a couple of days a week, but it has to be on an unpredictable schedule, or please call, but if I don't pick up, it means I'm busy - if you're having an emergency just text, and otherwise, know that I'll get back to you as soon as I can). Anyway, I can feel the resentment coming through the post, as well as the love for your Dad. You just need to rebalance.[/quote]

+100 Change the boundaries. Call when calm, show lots of love, and maybe change expectation to once a week or less, but you may do "bonus calls" now and then. That way, it's a happy surprise if you do more, rather than fury because it's not every day.[/quote]

Sad that people do not want to be part of their elderly parents' lives, or speak to them on a regular basis, but instead view their interactions as a checked box in a day. So sad. And forgetful of the time, money, and love they gave you as a child and when you needed it. [/quote]

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