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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We ski a lot with our kids, and I often stress to dh that he can't assume always that I am the one skiing behind the youngest ds in case he falls. But the fact is, unless I specifically say 'YOU ski behind him now', he skis ahead. Today he did so again, on a hard run. Ds fell, had a total meltdown and refused to move, skiers were shooting past us and it was very dangerous. I spent 30m coaxing him to get up and ski bc by this point dh was down the mountain. At one point a skier took me out hard. 
I guess the obvious answer is because I am not only the breadwinner but the default organizer and responsible party for EVERYTHING. I do 90% of the admin in addition to work, so resentment. But it feels like something even deeper like trust and fear or.. not sure. Dh is furious with me for yelling at him but meanwhile something about this scenario just lit a huge fire for me. [/quote]
Don’t blame yourself for being angry over  infuriating behavior on your husband’s part.

It is arrogant and selfish of him to constantly make you the default parent for your child so he can go skiing freely. It’s terrible he didn’t have the decency to stay close enough to see if you  needed help and it’s bad that you were alone during that situation with your kid.

Your husband sounds very narcissistic and exploitative. He sees nothing wrong with exploiting you financially and time-wise to make his own life unfairly easier because that’s his value system. I doubt he will ever see the error of his ways because it’s to his benefit not to. What you do with that is up to you, but he has no grounds to be angry with you and you must not let him gaslight you.[/quote]

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