Reply to my husband said something yesterday that broke my heart

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[quote=Anonymous]He said he thinks that people are laughing at him when they see him out and about.

He's a really big guy who has struggled with his weight forever. I think he thinks that's why people are noticing and laughing. I've never seen anyone laugh at him - we've been together for 17 years.

Sometimes he dresses badly - stained shirts that don't really fit; I wish he wouldn't, but I can only fight so much. I do think people notice when he's wearing clothes that don't fit.

But generally he does make some effort to look nice. And he does look nice. I think he looks really nice.

I just didn't know he feels this way. He said it in a way like he just takes it as a given that he is an object of derision. It's really shaken me that he feels this way - and feels it so deeply. I know that his shame over his body is at least part of what's causing us physical problems. It's been rough - but thankfully he's started therapy. I don't expect miracles but I do think it's positive that he finally feels ready, or at least willing, to talk to someone. I didn't know that he also extends this to basically the whole world.

I love this man. Everyone has issues and frustrations, and we're no exception, but I love him. I want him to feel good about himself. He's tried to lose weight, tried to exercise more - he could do a whole lot more than he's done but here we are now, and I don't want him to feel such self-loathing regardless of what his body looks and feels like.

I don't really have a question. But this is so personal it's not something I feel comfortable talking about with anyone I know in real life. Thanks for. listening.
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