Reply to 6th grade daughter refusing to acknowledge puberty

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[quote=Anonymous]You know shifting to bras is a difficult thing. My daughter did not wear them long past the time I thought she should. I just made sure they were available in a variety of styles and sizes and eventually she started wearing them more frequently. I would just leave it alone and get her some other options like some camisoles and such but let her make her own decisions.

Did she get her period? You should make sure she understands the essentials. Just get her a book and say here’s a book about something you’ll go through if you wanna talk about it I’m always available. Get her a bunch of different pads and offer to show her how to use them. Make sure she is prepared like if she goes away to camp or on an overnight sleepover, remind her to shove a few pads in her bag.

You should try to be low-key. My daughter was not happy about any of this and did not wanna talk about it or listen to it but I just kept making you know small reminders now and then, not any big talk and not any insistence that she do or behave anyway. She told me that having her period sounded horrible and I said that well you could make having a bowel movement sound horrible too but we all do it all the time and it’s not any big deal you just get used to it.

Honestly puberty for a girl is still a nightmare, it comes with all this unwelcome attention from random men, and bleeding for a week all the time is in fact super annoying with all the leaks and such. I would want to cover my ears and run away too. I just try to be low-key and normalizing and talk about it when things come up and offer a little bit of advice but not in the “you are a woman now” kind of way but more just like “you might find this useful; you’ll need to try different things; this is all normal.” I also told her about my own experiences and how my mother prepared me not at all; It was easier for her to listen to me talking about myself then for the focus to be on her.

Honestly she is mellow about it now and wears bras and deals with her period but it was a process that we both took slowly and over time. It’s a huge life transition and very stressful.
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