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[quote=Anonymous]DD (20) has a close college friend ("J", 20) who has invited her to tag along on a family trip this summer for two weeks, with everything paid for by friend's (uber-wealthy) parents. Trip would be J, J's parents, J's high school aged sister, and DD. J and DD would be flying out together; J's family will already be there.

The trip is to a resort club in the Caribbean at which J's family is a member. DD has shared the country/island she'd be going to with me, but not the name of the club, which she says she doesn't know and doesn't care to ask (because, "I don't want to be weird about it.") I've got a couple ideas based on googling but no certainty. The details I've gotten are that J and her family go several times a year, it's a very hush-hush sort of vibe, and DD would be asked to take minimal photos and not post anything on social media (unclear if this is a travel safety rule for J's family, or a club policy).

I've met J a few times and she's come on trips to our beach house when DD has brought friends; not a ton of facetime with her but overall I get the impression that J is a great kid-- polite, super down to earth, hard working academically, and overall a good influence on DD (frankly seems to make better decisions than DD/steers DD down more responsible paths). DD and J are both sophomores at a highly selective university; DD is generally doing well there and has given me the impression that J is as well.

It's not a question of "letting" DD go-- she's an adult who can make her own choices and it's not like she's asking me to pay for anything. Husband is apparently not worried in the slightest, his reasons being 
- DD has a ton of international travel experience-- with us, with school groups, and solo, and is a great traveler who has yet to have an issue 
- DD, while a sometimes mischievous boundary-tester, is overall responsible, has never been in serious trouble, would for sure be on her best behavior with J's parents, and J has historically proven to be a good influence 
- J's parents are high profile enough (think biglaw/business/politics, not entertainment) that husband is confident that nothing would happen to our kid as long as she's with J
- J's parents are a great career connection for DD and this should also be looked at as a networking opportunity ( :roll: )

My main concerns:
- I hate not knowing specifics on where she's going 
- I'm mildly concerned that this is the rich kid version of "I tell my parents I'm sleeping over at yours, you tell yours you're sleeping at mine" and that there are major details DD is leaving out. What if J's parents actually aren't going, what if they end up in some sort of weird Epstein-adjacent situation, etc etc. The level of secrecy gives me pause. 
- I know this is paranoid but I also can't help but think about it being something like White Lotus and am having visions of DD getting tossed off a cliff or something

I also think it's weird that J's parents haven't reached out to us in any way about this. I know DD would be mortified if I reached out to them, but I can't imagine inviting someone's college-aged kid on a trip like this and not checking in with the parents in any way (which I admit is a little insane for 20 year olds but they still seem so young to me!)

Should I keep prodding DD for more info? Do I try to get her to let me talk to J's parents? Do I just let it go, trust that this is going to be a once in a lifetime adventure, and stay hands off? [/quote]

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