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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it's so hard to see our kids hurting.  But as tough as it is, as other PPs have mentioned, he has to figure this out on his own.  Listening to him, showing empathy, and the advice to give him stepping back to allow her to step up is really good.  But just be careful that you aren't allowing him to wallow in it by constantly talking about it, your wanting to fix it, etc.  Some tough love might be needed, like not permitting him to skip practice.  If he joined a team, his responsibility is to go to practice.  It's disrespectful to his teammates and coaches not to.  And school work can't go ignored either.

I agree with you that the GF has the healthier attitude at this point in their lives, I remember my friends making their boyfriends priority 1 and ditching friends, scuttling their own activities and plans, to make their BF the center of their universe.  I have a 16 yr old DD whom I'm currently trying to guide through this type of thing as well, making sure she keeps her goals and interests as her top priority.

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