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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've also been horrified by the way my 15 year old son responds to his friends but I think we have to remember the way they communicate is not the same way middle aged ladies communicate.  It's SUPER hard but I've realized that unless he's actively bullying/hurting others, I need to take a step back and let him manage his social life his own way, even if it's not the way I would do it.  
[/quote]

I agree with this and this + some introvertedness was my thought until you described how he behaves when forced to be around people he wouldn't choose to hang out with.  My son is 18 now and he's dome out of his shell and I have no concerns anymore.  He's confident, funny, interesting and still a bit on the reserved side.  He really matured a lot socially just last summer.  So don't give up.  I relatively confident he'll find his people at college (he'll be on a sports team so that will help).

I would consider whether you think there is an element of arrogance to the rudeness.  I would tell him that this is how he's likely to be perceived by others. His reaction will tell you a lot.  Regardless, most kids at 18 aren't the same they were at 14- teens change very fast, so just try to guide him to move in the direction of being more polite and sociable.  [/quote]

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