Reply to Marriage not great-taking 5 day trip with DH to work on it

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[quote=Anonymous]My marriage is not in a great place. We have 2 kids, ages 5 and 7.

DH and I are supposed to go on a vacation together, just the two of us, next week.

The thing is, we don’t fight. We are just really living parallel lives and rarely interact. We don’t have sex anymore (DH’s choice-not mine).

I would love to improve the relationship but I don’t see how it’s possible. DH is extremely avoidant, to the point that it’s hard to have any kind of real conversation with him. He just refuses to engage or yes’s me to death and never follows through with what we agree on.

I guess I’m not sure how to approach this time together. We don’t do date nights and have had sex fewer than 10 times in the last 5 years. I don’t expect that DH will be open to sex. I’d like to try and talk to him, but I’m worried it will create bad feelings and then we are stuck on this trip together while miserable. I do have massive amounts of disappointment in our marriage and anger. I’d like things to get better but I’m afraid if we talk about our marriage, then I’ll get caught up in my anger.

We are pretty good at just coexisting on a superficial level and that tends to be our default. Should I just roll with that?

I should mention we are both also exhausted and burnt out and if nothing else we need sleep and rest.[/quote]

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