Reply to Possible new autism diagnosis in high school

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[quote=Anonymous]My 10th grader DS has struggled all his life in various ways. He has had an ADHD diagnosis since first grade, along with a diagnosis of generalized anxiety disorder. From the time he was a toddler, I worried about him and knew he was different. However, despite my suspicions that he was on the spectrum, he has never received an autism diagnosis. When he was in preschool, I felt like he fit the profile in some ways for what we then called Asperger's. He has always been socially reserved/anxious, struggled to make casual conversation, used to have specific interests although that seems to have gone away over the years. He had a full neuropsych in first grade when he received the ADHD diagnosis, and the evaluator did not feel he had enough autistic traits to warrant a diagnosis. Since then, he has had less extensive evaluations and appointments with psychiatrists and psychologists over the years, and no one ever even brought up autism. His social issues seemed to improve by late elementary, and then when he was in middle school Covid hit, and really muddied the waters as far as what was normal socially. He definitely became more isolated during Covid and since starting high school, has withdrawn even more. It doesn't help that our school zoning is such that the majority of kids he want to middle school with now attend a different high school. He has expressed high levels of anxiety surrounding social situations, and is basically afraid to try. He does want friends, I think - just doesn't know how to go about it. He started individual therapy last summer to address the social anxiety, executive function issues, and low level depression I think he experiences at times. During my last check-in with the therapist, she mentioned revisiting the autism evaluation and recommended a place that specializes in autism diagnosis without going through a full neuropsych exam (since we know he has ADHD and we're not particularly worried about learning disabilities at this point). She felt that if he is on the spectrum, having that knowledge might lead to a level of self-understanding that is helpful to him. I will say that as my younger two (NT) children get older and I see their social lives and executive functioning skills develop, I understand more deeply just how different/delayed these skills are for my oldest.

I am wondering if anyone has been through late testing/diagnosis of autism in the teen years and what it meant for your kid. Were there additional therapies of interventions you felt were helpful at such a late stage? Was it helpful for your teen as far as self-understanding and awareness? If he has autism, I feel incredibly guilty and overwhelmed that we didn't know/understand earlier. Parenting him has been exhausting and I just want to get him on the right track for a fulfilling, independent life. I am scared and confused, and I want to do what's right for him.[/quote]

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