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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've posted before about the advice our prescribing psychiatrist gave me about my DS who sounds similar to yours: [i]Focus on getting your DS through HS without depression and without a substance abuse issue. Everything else can be fixed after that[/i].

That advice was a game changer for me. It didn't mean I had no expectations or goals for DS. It WAS the goal. Getting thru HS meant graduating with a regular diploma. So, I focused on that. I stopped thinking of grades and 'after HS'.

Instead, I focused on 'effort' as reflected by the number of assignments completed and turned in on time. I communicated this to all of DS's teachers every year. It was the only IEP goal I cared about. I tied it to privileges - outstanding assignments?  No screen time/cell phone for you. I reviewed the school's online SW every evening with DS and on Sundays we reviewed what was coming up the next week. I did NOT restrict sports at all. There are a lot of benefits of sports (all rec league).

Did I enjoy this? Not at all. But, the goal was met. DS is now 20 and has gotten his shlt together. He found a passion and is now willing to do things he has no interest in because he recognizes he has to do them to get where he wants to be. Time and maturity have made a HUGE difference.  HTH

[/quote]

+100

The Self Driven Child gives great advice. I did a version of this with my kid and his grades and effort really improved.

OP, it sounds like screens aren’t the issue here! Huge win. Keep up the great work and when he gets to 16, prompt him to develop a plan for independence. He will need a job and to start paying rent of continues to live at home. How does he intend to do that? [/quote]

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